Quote of the Day

Steven Wright

March 22, 2017

“Last night somebody broke into my apartment and replaced everything with exact duplicates… When I pointed it out to my roommate, he said, ‘Do I ...


“I’m not worried about the bullet with my name on it… just the thousands out there marked ‘Occupant.'” Quotes of the Day

Cary Grant

“I improve on misquotation.” Quotes of the Day

David Letterman

“There’s no business like show business, but there are several businesses like accounting.” Quotes of the Day

Buck Henry

“We need a president who’s fluent in at least one language.” Quotes of the Day

Woody Allen

“More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let ...

Benjamin Disraeli

“How much easier it is to be critical than to be correct.” Quotes of the Day

Arthur C. Clarke

“The only way to discover the limits of the possible is to go beyond them into the impossible.” Quotes of the Day

W. Somerset Maugham

“If nobody spoke unless he had something to say, the human race would very soon lose the use of speech.” Quotes of the Day

Jeff Foxworthy

“If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in the world, all you have to do is go to ...

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